I recently spoke to a client, James, who had some limiting beliefs around marketing himself to others, as we all do. He’s an entrepreneur, so telling others how he can help (which is what I call marketing) is an important part of his work life. I challenged him to get 15 “no’s.”
Here’s the challenge:
Whatever goods or services you offer, offer them to enough people to get 15 refusals. Yep, that’s right, 15 “no’s.”
“No, I wouldn’t like a life coaching session.”
“No, I don’t need 6 award-winning cupcakes for $15.”
“No, I don’t need my yard landscaped.”
Many of my clients resist this exercise.
They resist the exercise because it brings up all their (limiting) beliefs about marketing.
When I first started out as a life coach, I had a lot of limiting beliefs about marketing. Or maybe just one, but it stopped me in my tracks: I’m a doctor and “only quacks” advertise.
With that thought in my head, was it any wonder I had a hard time letting people know I could help?
Getting 15 no’s changed everything for me.
Challenging James to get 15 no’s brought up his limiting beliefs about marketing. Once he was aware of those thoughts, he could question them.
Bringing thoughts from unconsciousness to consciousness is the first step.
Sometimes clients refuse the challenge to get 15 no’s. (James didn’t refuse. He was all in.)
That path also leads to awareness.
The question, “Why can’t you get 15 no’s?” brings up the limiting beliefs so you can examine them.
Once James accepted the challenge, his brain started to shift focus. He reframed a “no” into a “yes” and changed his experience of offering his services to people he thought he could help.
Rather than thinking fearfully about someone rejecting his offer, he started thinking of a “no” as a good thing—for now.
Once he’d completed the challenge, “no” didn’t remain a good thing, but it didn’t become something to fear again, either.
“No,” became much more neutral.
“Would you like my help?”
“No, thanks.”
“Okay, have a good day.”
In order to let people know we can help, we have to tell them we can help and offer them a specific service (or product, if that’s how you help.)
If we have a lot of fear around offering our help (i.e., marketing,) we will not offer our help to anyone.
The world is helped less and we are less fulfilled.
You know what else happens when you get 15 “no’s?”
You get a bunch of “yes’s,” too.
Then you get to help all the people who said yes.
The world is helped more and we are more fulfilled.
That, in my opinion, is a win-win!