“Why can’t I get ahead?”
Because you keep thinking, “I can’t get ahead.”
The mind is very concrete. It will believe anything you tell it over and over. A client recently told me that he worked hard on himself, in many different ways, but he still “couldn’t get ahead.” I bet he said that to himself a hundred times a day.
In the movie, What The Bleep Do We Know!?, one of the experts interviewed mentioned that most people walk around thinking negative thoughts all day long, then put a little “shmear” of positivity over it, and think that’s enough.
It isn’t.
If our default setting is negative thoughts that cause pain and suffering, that means it is easy for us to think this way. Changing our thoughts to be more positive is going to be hard work. Not that it can’t be done. But reciting a few affirmations or meditating once a week is not going to do it.
If, however, you are not doing anything to change your thoughts from negative to positive, then reciting a few affirmations is a start—as long as you believe the affirmations you are reciting.
Meditating once a week is a start, too. More is better, but a little is good. If you keep it up, you will start to see a shift toward the positive.
I have a good friend who goes to yoga once a week. He told me recently that one of the instructors, who hadn’t seen him practicing yoga in about a year, was impressed at how much he’d improved. He hadn’t really noticed because it was a very gradual process, but after his teacher’s comment, he realized he could do things in his yoga practice now that he couldn’t imagine doing a year ago. All from going to yoga once a week.
There are many ways to train yourself to think positive thoughts. (Here are a few resources.) It’s a process, it takes time. But it’s well worth the effort, in my opinion.
My life is so different today than it was a few years ago. Yes, some circumstances have changed, but the biggest changes have taken place in my mind. I no longer believe, as my client does, that “I’ll never get ahead.”
Now, when I have a negative thought, I almost always have a positive thought that counters it. And when I don’t, when I sink into that spiral of negative thinking, I almost always realize I’m doing it and stop.
I don’t believe the negative thoughts that separate me and isolate me from all the love that is always available to me—what an amazing gift.
A gift that I am willing to keep giving myself by continuing to “practice” positive thinking, any way I can.
How do you practice positive thinking in your life?
Bravo. Well put. I think (as you suggest) that there is no one single thing that will necessarily cause the transformation to more positive thinking. For me, three specific things come to mind when I think about what has helped contribute to positive thinking in my life:
1) <strong)Immersion in positive thinking through reading / listening to many books from many different authors. Each one contributes to my thinking in small or large ways and it makes an impact over time.
2) Avoidance of negative thinking.
First – by no longer listening or watching news on a regular basis. Instead I read all news stories, allowing me to pick and choose what I want to focus my attention on and avoiding much of the “negative spin” that can be placed on items. As someone once said to me, you are impacted by everything you take in, you can choose to actively control those inputs or let them control you.
Second – by limiting time spent with people who have seem to have a negative report on a regular basis. This has somewhat happened unconsciously as I find myself spending less and less time with some people. As Joel Osteen says “love them from a distance”.
3) Meditation. It is easy to overlook what a positive impact this has as there is no epiphany or dramatic event that happens during most meditation sessions; however the incremental improvement in attitude is significant.
Hey Jim,
Thanks for your thoughtful comments. And I love that you shared the things that have helped you move toward positivity in your life. Having real life examples to look to can help others feel like they can do the same thing. It definitely helps me!
Warmly,
Diane