Blog: Healing Choices
This blog focuses on the small moments that make a good day into a bad day, or a terrible day into a gift of a day. It’s my belief that developing awareness in these small moments is the practice we need to be able to navigate all the ups and downs of life, from loss and grief to love, peace, and joy.
I Choose to…
A client and I were talking about lack of time recently. I told her that I used to feel time pressured constantly—even when I was on vacation. In my head, I heard a litany of “I have to do this, and I have to do that.” Last fall I decided to try an experiment. Every...
I Wonder What You Think of Me
This morning after I dropped my son off at preschool, I went running. Normally, I wouldn’t tell you that. Why? Because you might think I was lazy, or a bad mom, or self-centered, or shallow, or any of a million other things I have no control over. But I just re-read...
I’m Not Perfect
Last week, I wore one of my husband’s running shirts while I was painting. I got paint on it and it didn’t come out when I washed it. It turned out to be the Finisher T-shirt from his first marathon. He was not happy about it. I apologized, sincerely, and told him I...
The Stop Doing List
There are a lot of things I want to do in this world. I have big dreams, big goals. My son is getting a little older and I’m going to have more time to do other things before too long. In order to get ready—to be ready—I need to make a list. No, not a To-Do List: A...
Getting Off the Emotional Roller Coaster
A client recently asked me, “How do I get off this roller coaster of feeling so up and down all the time?” I believe the answer to that question lies in our ability to change our thoughts, not with our ability to change our circumstances. But we cannot cultivate our...
Square Four of the Change Cycle: The Promised Land
Square Four of Martha Beck's change cycle is where all your hard work of creating a new life, a new identity, pays off. The learning curve starts to level off and you pretty much know what’s going on and where you’re headed. Your life (or whatever part of it is in...
Square Three of the Change Cycle: The Hero’s Saga
When you are in the midst of a major change or transition in your life, at some point you have to stop making plans, dreaming, making lists, and goal-setting; you have to actually do something! When you do something in service to your new identity or life, now you are...
Square Two of the Change Cycle: Dreaming and Scheming
The hallmark of Square Two is hope: You start to think maybe things can be different. You start to see, even though your old life is gone, you can have something different and more satisfying than what you left behind. At the beginning of Square Two, hope comes...
Square One of The Change Cycle: Death and Rebirth
Over the years, I’ve worked with many clients as they made their way through the change cycle. Some of them called me because they’d been thrown into Square One and needed help navigating their way through Square One and on to Square Two. Other clients called me when...
The Change Cycle is Made Up of Squares?
The change cycle, which Martha Beck explains in detail in her book Finding Your Own North Star, is about the cycle of change we all go through every time we have a major transition in our lives. It’s a circle, just like the circle of life, even though the four...