I’ve been doing a lot of things that scare me lately. I’ve been speaking up and speaking out more than ever before. Even though I have thoughts like: What are they going to think of me? What if they don’t like me? What if I’m wrong?
I’ve been speaking up and doing scary things because I made a promise to myself to show up as my true self as much as possible this year.
The result is I feel vulnerable a lot.
But I can handle vulnerable. I can handle my emotions—my doubt, my fear, even my anger. Emotions pass, like the clouds.
A couple of weeks ago I sent an email to an acquaintance offering some information and an opinion I thought might be useful. I reasoned that I had this information because of my background as a physician and a life coach and I knew this person didn’t have this information. Once I wrote the email I hesitated to send it, so I made a mental list:
My reasons not to send the email:
- The recipient might think I’m a “know-it-all.”
- The recipient might think I’m a busybody.
- The recipient might think I’m a weirdo.
- The information might not be useful.
My reasons to send the email:
- The recipient might find the information useful and be able to make a better decision with it than without it.
- The recipient can delete the email if she doesn’t find it helpful.
My reasons not to send the email were all about me. My reasons to send the email were all about the other person.
My reasons not to send the email were all about fear. My reasons to send the email were all about love.
I sent the email.
I’d like to tell you that the person responded positively to my email, but the truth is she didn’t respond at all.
That’s okay. When I clicked “send,” I gave up trying to control what the recipient thought of me. I gave her permission to think whatever she wanted to about me (since she’s going to anyway.)
When I clicked “send,” I showed up as my true self in that moment. If, in the next moment, I also choose to show up as my true self, those moments start to add up to an authentic life.
Are you showing up as your true self in the moments of your day?
Diane MacKinnon, MD, is a family physician, master life coach, writer, and blogger. You can find her speaking schedule and other writings at www.dianemackinnon.com.