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Healing Choices
Positive Thinking Takes Effort
“Why can’t I get ahead?” Because you keep thinking, “I can’t get ahead.” The mind is very concrete. It will believe anything you tell it over and over. A client recently told me that he worked hard on himself, in many different ways, but he still “couldn’t get ahead.”...
Your Brain On Gratitude
I have been keeping a gratitude journal on and off for years. I tend to write in it most nights, but not every night. If my husband goes to bed before me, I don’t usually turn the light on to write out my gratitude list. Sometimes, if I’m feeling especially grateful,...
Don’t Take Anything Personally
Last year a woman who had been babysitting for my son regularly for months didn’t show up one morning. At first, I thought I mistook the time and I called her, leaving a voice mail message. Later, I tried again. Once I realized she wasn’t coming at all, I sent a text...
Self-Love
A few weeks ago, I had an epiphany. But first, I had a meltdown. That’s when I realized I was pushing myself in a way that I would never do to anyone else. You see, my son had been sick, I’d been sick, and other family members needed care. So I cared for everyone and...
Not My Business
I’ve noticed lately that a lot of people are in my business—and I don’t like it. I think: They need to mind their own business. So now who’s business am I in? Right—their business. Byron Katie says there are only three kinds of business: your business, my business,...
Perfection Is Impossible
Perfectionism is not only an impossibility, it’s the height of arrogance. Why? Because perfectionists (like me, although I like to think of myself as a “recovering perfectionist” these days) hold themselves to a different standard. Here’s what a perfectionist is...
Self-Esteem II
Last week I wrote about self-esteem and a reader reminded me that self-esteem comes from self-love. The only way we can think well of ourselves is if we actually have love for ourselves as well as others. Out of the feeling of self-acceptance comes the good decision...
Self-Esteem Comes From Good Decisions
Lately I’ve been hearing a lot about self-esteem and the lack thereof. Here’s my definition of self-esteem. Make good decisions that impact your well-being in a positive way. Someone who has good self-esteem acts in a way that requires people (including themselves) to...
Sometimes A Noise Is Just A Noise
My husband snores sometimes. Back in the day, when we were newly married, this drove me crazy. I thought we were going to end up in separate bedrooms—not something I aspired to that first year (or now, for that matter.) I would lie in bed in the middle of the night,...
Re-Entry
I just got back from a weekend away with my siblings. We do it once a year. It was a very low-key weekend, but it was one of those times where I was exactly where I wanted to be, with exactly the people I wanted to be with. It was a great weekend. And today, here I...
Whole Healer
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