Blog: Healing Choices
This blog focuses on the small moments that make a good day into a bad day, or a terrible day into a gift of a day. It’s my belief that developing awareness in these small moments is the practice we need to be able to navigate all the ups and downs of life, from loss and grief to love, peace, and joy.
Positive Thinking Takes Effort
“Why can’t I get ahead?” Because you keep thinking, “I can’t get ahead.” The mind is very concrete. It will believe anything you tell it over and over. A client recently told me that he worked hard on himself, in many different ways, but he still “couldn’t get ahead.”...
Your Brain On Gratitude
I have been keeping a gratitude journal on and off for years. I tend to write in it most nights, but not every night. If my husband goes to bed before me, I don’t usually turn the light on to write out my gratitude list. Sometimes, if I’m feeling especially grateful,...
Don’t Take Anything Personally
Last year a woman who had been babysitting for my son regularly for months didn’t show up one morning. At first, I thought I mistook the time and I called her, leaving a voice mail message. Later, I tried again. Once I realized she wasn’t coming at all, I sent a text...
Self-Love
A few weeks ago, I had an epiphany. But first, I had a meltdown. That’s when I realized I was pushing myself in a way that I would never do to anyone else. You see, my son had been sick, I’d been sick, and other family members needed care. So I cared for everyone and...
Not My Business
I’ve noticed lately that a lot of people are in my business—and I don’t like it. I think: They need to mind their own business. So now who’s business am I in? Right—their business. Byron Katie says there are only three kinds of business: your business, my business,...
Perfection Is Impossible
Perfectionism is not only an impossibility, it’s the height of arrogance. Why? Because perfectionists (like me, although I like to think of myself as a “recovering perfectionist” these days) hold themselves to a different standard. Here’s what a perfectionist is...
Self-Esteem II
Last week I wrote about self-esteem and a reader reminded me that self-esteem comes from self-love. The only way we can think well of ourselves is if we actually have love for ourselves as well as others. Out of the feeling of self-acceptance comes the good decision...
Self-Esteem Comes From Good Decisions
Lately I’ve been hearing a lot about self-esteem and the lack thereof. Here’s my definition of self-esteem. Make good decisions that impact your well-being in a positive way. Someone who has good self-esteem acts in a way that requires people (including themselves) to...
Sometimes A Noise Is Just A Noise
My husband snores sometimes. Back in the day, when we were newly married, this drove me crazy. I thought we were going to end up in separate bedrooms—not something I aspired to that first year (or now, for that matter.) I would lie in bed in the middle of the night,...
Re-Entry
I just got back from a weekend away with my siblings. We do it once a year. It was a very low-key weekend, but it was one of those times where I was exactly where I wanted to be, with exactly the people I wanted to be with. It was a great weekend. And today, here I...